To the End and Back

Disregarded endeavors, destroyed hopes, an utter feeling of loneliness and the sheer disgust of every single thing around you make wild turns. They leave you with no other option but one and only will to end all this in a single blow. The light you always looked for, the joy you always wanted, and feeling which were as strong as He himself are now drowning, in shallow dust!

And when you are almost on the verge of thinking to commit that, which is the most unmoral and carnally sinuous act of mankind; a power, an unseen force pulls you back and says, "You dumb fool! Have you forgotten about us?" Your sternness and arrogance wants to fight back, saying "I'm useless, irresponsible, unworthy! Let me go, please! Do not stop me, do not compel me to stay behind and watch myself get this excruciating pain!". But that holy mightiness makes you afloat your dreams, your visions, your thoughts and your aims! Then it makes you taste your own decision again. And to your uttermost surprise, what appeared the sweetest and tastiest of all, now tastes awfully bitter!

You are surprised, and demand immediate explanation. The power does nothing, and sets you to your own feet, asking you to walk your way again. But you don't feel like walking towards destruction anymore, you want to stay behind with that power and still necessitate what was yet unanswered, "What did you just do to me? What did you make me feel? Why was all this?". No answer comes. You try listening hard, and harder! But you don't find anything which responds to your agonal cries for just, answers! Suddenly you hear faint whispers, only faded voicelessness. They are voices from within, your inside!

And to your astonishment, every question is now answered, the door to destruction is now closed! You are yourself, yet again!